Velochimp: Astrochimp on Cycling

Goldenfiddle imagines what the conversation that lead up to the above scene must have sounded like. Lance is partying with Hollywood types and Livin’ Strong now that he is retired. Matthew Mcconaughey seems to be a mentor or coach to Lance Armstrong as he switches to the monk like existence of a Pro Cyclist to a the lifestyle of a Hollywood raconteur. The only guy missing from this bunch is Jake Gyllenhaul who is set to portray Lance in an upcoming move titled “Brokeback L’Alpe D’Huez”.

FADE IN:

INT. A BEACH HOUSE BATHROOM, MALIBU, CALIFORNIA. NIGHT Matthew Mcconaughey and Lance Armstrong shower, shave, wax, pluck, gel, and get dressed before for a big night at Sky Bar in Los Angeles.

LANCE: Hey, Matt.

MATT: What can I do you for, LA?

LANCE: You gonna wear the linen shirt tonight?

MATT: That’s right.

LANCE: Yeah, me too. Hey, Matt.

MATT: What now, amigo?

LANCE: How many buttons you gonna leave unbuttoned?

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